A Conversation With My Thoughts

In less than 48 hours, I will be on my way to Boise, Idaho for an interview as a Chiropractic Assistant. It's actually the second interview I will have with Dr. Henze. The first was over the phone and went well, in my opinion. I feel peaceful and confident in one way, nervous and uncertain in another.

For the past year, my husband and I have been trying to go where the Lord wants us. We've been from Idaho, to Colorado, to Ohio. Each place has had something for us to learn and to contribute. And I've now felt that the time is to return to Idaho, something I have wanted pretty much since we arrived in Ohio.

There has been a sense of urgency. I believe some of the urgency comes from divine intervention and the other from self preservation. For the past six months, living with my mother has been a roller coaster of emotion and experience, some stressful and some enlightening. I am reminded why I so desperately wanted to leave for college at 17. My mother and my relationship does much better with some miles in between.

We are radically different. Night and day fails to represent our vibrant contrast of personalities and understanding of the universe and life. While some of our goals may be similar, our approach to reach them would never align, ever. Such things make living in the same space for a prolonged period of time makes for high stress and high emotions.

Thus, my being compelled to seek employment elsewhere while my husband continues to learn about his side business. I know that being in Ohio has enabled me to have a few moments with my brothers and sister as well as my Uncle Steve. It has also been during our time here that my Grandma Rose was diagnosed with lung cancer. I remember her being on my mind before we came to Ohio and not knowing why. I plan to visit her this up-coming weekend.

Since being here, I have also developed office skills that have made me qualified for the position for which I am now applying in Idaho. I also think I have drawn closer to my Savior and have had a renewed interest in pursuing other spiritual goals. I look forward to once again being close to a temple.

So, now we come back full circle to the reason I started writing this post. The interview in Boise. In writing this post, I almost feel too confident, too sure of being offered the position, that I think I might be confused and heartbroken if I am not. It is the absolute calm that I feel that is holding my nerves together, so I guess I can know that whatever happens, the Lord is with me and ready to open another window if a door is shut.